Monday, May 18, 2009

Best before date for breast implants.

Years ago, I had to take some kind of liberal arts elective. I settled on an introduction to inter-personal psychology and because there was only no major research paper but a series of in-class exercises and only two exams - a mid-term and a final. It turned out to be the biggest single mistake of my post-secondary education. I was at least 12 years older than everyone in the class but the professor. I found myself much like an alien who transported in an unexplored touchy-feelie universe.

One of the first class exercises the professor gave was to hand out a sheet of paper to every class member (yes, I it was a long time ago and I realize this dates me.) We were given 15 minutes to write out everything we hated about ourselves. I drew a complete blank. As I scanned the room everyone’s head was down and scribbling furiously but mine. Some even requested more paper.

By the time 15 minutes were up, I still had nothing to show for my time. I spent the next hour listening to a long boring litany of complaints from my classmates listing how they hated their noses, faces, eyes, thighs, weight or lack of – yadda, yadda. Then it was my turn to join in the fest of mutual self-loathing and I simply stated there was nothing I hated about myself. Of course the professor challenged me and demanding there had to be something I hated about myself – like the fact I was short.

I simply stated no. It had been a distinct advantage in my former career and I had a husband who was very tall so it worked out quite well for us as he could reach where I couldn’t and I moved with ease where he strained. This turned out to be a rather long bitter exchange between the professor and myself and the course simply went downhill from there for me, but my point was, there comes a time when one should realize that spending time focusing one any alleged physical short-comings is as futile as nailing jello to a wall. So what has this got to do with Quebec women getting short-changed on their breast implants? Well, who knew breast implants have a limited shelf-life? Toronto Star

Saline implants have about a 10-year shelf life before they must be replaced, he said, adding gel implants are believed to last up to 25 years though it's impossible to say for sure as they've only existed for 17 years. Saline implants, he added, are also more prone to ripple at the sides or become hard.

Who knew? Certainly not me, but then, I have never had the desire to spend overt amounts of time and/or energy to supplement or enhance significantly what my genetic code has wrought. It seems to me we spend far too much time and energy focusing on any alleged deficiencies in our physical appearance rather than doing the necessary soul searching which leads us to believe we are less than what we were created to be – an entire universe within ourselves waiting only to be discovered.

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