US War Plan to Invade Canada has been declassified and available for photocopying at 15 cents a page

For years my eyes have been rolling whenever I heard Canadians argue that Americans secretly long to invade Canada and are waiting for just the opportunity to do so. The Washington Post reports on the US battle plan for the invasion of Canada.

Invading Canada won't be like invading Iraq: When we invade Canada, nobody will be able to grumble that we didn't have a plan.

The United States government does have a plan to invade Canada. It's a 94-page document called "Joint Army and Navy Basic War Plan -- Red," with the word SECRET stamped on the cover. It's a bold plan, a bodacious plan, a step-by-step plan to invade, seize and annex our neighbor to the north. It goes like this:
First, we send a joint Army-Navy overseas force to capture the port city of Halifax, cutting the Canadians off from their British allies.

Then we seize Canadian power plants near Niagara Falls, so they freeze in the dark.
Then the U.S. Army invades on three fronts -- marching from Vermont to take Montreal and Quebec, charging out of North Dakota to grab the railroad center at Winnipeg, and storming out of the Midwest to capture the strategic nickel mines of Ontario.
Meanwhile, the U.S. Navy seizes the Great Lakes and blockades Canada's Atlantic and Pacific ports.

At that point, it's only a matter of time before we bring these Molson-swigging, maple-mongering Zamboni drivers to their knees! Or, as the official planners wrote, stating their objective in bold capital letters: "ULTIMATELY TO GAIN COMPLETE CONTROL."

It sounds like a joke but it's not. War Plan Red is real. It was drawn up and approved by the War Department in 1930, then updated in 1934 and 1935. It was declassified in 1974 and the word "SECRET" crossed out with a heavy pencil. Now it sits in a little gray box in the National Archives in College Park, available to anybody, even Canadian spies. They can photocopy it for 15 cents a page. War Plan Red was actually designed for a war with England.

Thanks to the Liberals and their infamous gun registry any invasion force can rapidly pinpoint the last few holdouts with weapons in Canada. So how many toy guns do you think that Canadians can rustle up to make a token protest to any invasion/occupation? Does Hudson Bay even carry toy guns anymore? I bet Quebec is the first province to officially surrender. I am sorry, but the thought of an US invasion/occupation of Canada just cracks me up. I can picture Jack Layton attempting to rally the masses for a last stand at a local Toronto welfare office…..

But if the liberals do win re-election, I say we make a personal appeal to GWB to dust off the plan and liberate us from our own worse excesses. I doubt that the US would actually have to do much revision to the 1935 plan and it won’t take as many men or resources as Iraq. One might not be able to legislate salvation for all, but liberation from liberal rule would go a long way in helping in making the quality of my life better.