Wednesday, December 05, 2007

This could be one of the reasons Atheists get such poor PR

Richard Dawkins on "sexual jealous".
Just as we rise above nature when we spend time writing a book or a symphony rather than devoting our time to sowing our selfish genes and fighting our rivals, so mightn't we rise above nature when tempted by the vice of sexual jealousy?

I, for one, feel drawn to the idea that there is something noble and virtuous in rising above nature in this way. I admit that I have, at times in my life, been jealous, but it is one of the things I now regret. Assuming that such practical matters as sexually transmitted diseases and the paternity of children can be sorted out (and nowadays DNA testing will clinch that for you if you are sufficiently suspicious, which I am not), what, actually, is wrong with loving more than one person? Why should you deny your loved one the pleasure of sexual encounters with others, if he or she is that way inclined? The British writer Julie Burchill is not somebody I usually quote (imagine a sort of intelligent Ann Coulter speaking with a British accent in a voice like Minnie Mouse) but I was struck by one of her remarks. I can't find the exact quote, but it was to the effect that, however much you love your mate (of either sex in the case of the bisexual Burchill) sex with a stranger is almost always more exciting, purely because it is a stranger. An exaggeration, no doubt, but the same grain of truth lurks in Woody Allen's "Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of the best."
I don't really know how typical this kind of thinking and/or ethics this is among atheists, but if it is, I need to strike atheists off the suitable list, and just go for a Talmud scholar next time I feel the need to get married. Preferably a scholar who knows the meaning of tractate Bava Metzia 59a.

2 comments:

Ben (The Tiger in Exile) said...

Some people just aren't meant for marriage.

Actually, I think it would make sense for family law to reflect this -- provide a variety of options. "Open" (different causes of action for divorce), "Term" (five years renewable), or "Life" (old-fashioned, till death us do part, etc.).

Let the social experimenters experiment, and leave the rest with the choice of the tried-and-true formula.

K. Shoshana said...

Well, there is a historical precedent for this already, the Romans had term marriages and marriages for life. Problem was, term marriages are not terribly attractive to women or the most optimun environment to raise children in.