I intend on going to the movies which is quite a feat for me. I rarely watch anything outside of my home because I usually fall asleep within 20 minutes. What can I say? Most movies just don’t engage me enough to stay awake. The last movie I saw in a movie theatre was Serenity and I did manage to watch it from beginning to end without naps.I want to see the 300. If I could choose to be any group of ancient women, I’d chose the Spartans. Forget the Athenian wanksters, as I have no desire to spend my life cloistered in the family home. I may love my jewelry and make-up but I would gladly give it up for the freedom Spartan women possessed as their birthright.
I had asked the boys if they wanted to go with me to watch the 300 and they both turned me down flat. They mocked the very idea of going with me. They want to watch the movie but just not with me. Now my daughter, the Last Amazon, just adores movies and television. There are three things in her life she is always up for – watching a movie, reading a book and going shopping, so I thought she would jump at the chance of going with me to see the 300.
Was I ever wrong. Apparently, the thought of going with the movies with her mother to watch 300 is a task worthy to be added to the labors of Hercules. I thought I could count on her passion for a story and her innate sense of loyalty since the boys had refused me outright. Eventually, guilt got the better of her common sense (her words – not mine) and she has agreed to go provided I agree to the following conditions:
I am not to talk or mumble under my breath even if the story is not true to Herodotus’ account nor I am not to even utter the slightest sigh of protest against the plot line.
If the style of battle is wrong, or armor, or weapons used are not historically true to the times, I am on no account allow to publicly protest or even sigh deeply.
If the Spartan women are shown in long gowns, wearing jewelry or make-up and/or shown to cry in public; I am not to make the slight sound. Nor am I allowed to make faces at the screen in the dark. Same goes, if the Spartan men don’t have long hair which they dress elaborately dress before battle.
Under no account am I allowed to throw popcorn or licorice at the screen as a sign of protest. I am not allowed to squirm in my seat. Apparently, this is a big distraction. Nor am I allow to curse in any language under my breath. If at any time my breathing becomes heavy or rapid she has the right to demand I leave the movie theatre immediately.
And she’s the loyal child.
7 comments:
From what I understand it hews very very closely to the graphic novel. And there is precious little crying in Frank Miller graphic novels. Lots of gritted teeth and bulging forehead veins, but not many tears. Only one, in fact, if I recall the graphic novel correctly. And it wasn't from Gorgo (wife of King Leonidas).
Kate:
You may appreciate the relative freedom enjoyed by Spartan women (impressive for its time/place), but considering how the Spartans raised young men, I'll stick with the modern world.
Hope ya enjoyed the movie.
Michael, your objections make you sound like one of my sons. You should see the look they give me every time I tell them how Spartan mothers would give their sons their first shields and the sage advice "with it or on it".
But to tell you the truth, I am quite attached to this modern world and consider flushing toilets one true innovations of this modern world.
I was acually thinking of the way that the young men of Sparta, around the age 12 (just after getting a shield and admonition from Mom), were apprenticed to older soldiers, to learn to be warriors, and also to be the homosexual love slaves of the regiments.
When it was time to marry them off, they had to be "de-sensitized" by receiving as a lover a pre-pubescent boy in drag.
The ancient Greeks were twisted that way...
Michael, it was actually around 7 years that the boys were sent to live in the men’s barracks until at least their 30th birthday.
And since you bring up the Athenian slur there are two things you should keep in mind when discussing ancient sexually and practices. Firstly, you have to throw all precepts of modern sexual relationships out the window.
By that I mean; you should keep in mind there was a real blurring of the lines between morality and sex. It was extremely common for any hole in the ground or beast to do (literally) and rape was a common practice and approved weapon of warfare – approved and practiced on the vanquished enemy soldiers as well. And it was not just practiced by the Greeks but by almost all groups of ancient peoples with the possibly exception being the Jews. If anything, our western modern view of love and sexual morality draws directly from the influence of Judaism.
The point of a Spartan military training was to eliminate or remove all phobias under the guise of building the mentally and physically strongest military force possible. A soldier who was raped by an enemy soldier could be potentially too traumatized to rally and fight on - just had no place in ancient Sparta. Hence, the training methods.
The Spartans practiced a limited form of passive homosexuality but they did not glamorize it or promote it like the Athenians did - who raised pederasty to almost to an art form. In fact, one of the reasons the Spartans held the Athenians in such contempt was their promotion of homosexuality as a higher form of sexual congress.
For what its worth, Aristotle might be considered to qualify as a modern homophobe and maintained that pederasty/active homosexuality had so perverted the Athenians to such a large degree that he sent his sons to be trained by the Spartans.
In Nicomachean Ethics (1138b30) Aristotle refers to homosexuality as a form of “brutality” and those who engage actively in it or hold a decided perference for it are like “beasts.”
Kate:
I was aware of the Athenean practices, but not the Spartan's differences from them.
And I do know that modern sexual mores are, um, different from those of the ancient world (again, with the exception of Jewish law on the subject).
Mostly, I was just saying that I'd prefer to live in the here and now.
I don't really mind the Spartan mother's admonition to her sons, though. In the loony-romantic 19th century America, many a soldier went to the Civil War vowing to take it seriously.
Again, though, I think the here-and-now is better.
And let's not forget just who won the Pelopennisian War (which was brought on by the eventual Greek victory over the Persians, a war which included the Battle of Thermopolye).
Also, and this is a totally of the wall question, did the movie get to the real root of the Spartan achievement in that battle: That they could hold out so long because they were fully armored in bronze, and equipped with bronze swords and shields, and fighting an opponent clad in linen, and carrying wicker shields? Just curious...
I have to confess that I have not yet seen the movie and only the trailers - movie day is this Thursday for the LA and I - that's also the day ten 12 year old boys are set to descend on my house. I'm putting the "Man" in charge.
Judging by the trailers, the Spartans are protrayed fighting in the buff which wouldn't have been historically accurate. One of the reasons Spartans held off so long was their superior armor. Plus the twin strategic advantages of using the cliffs and fighting in the hoplite phalanx formation. If my memory isn't failing me, the pass between the cliffs was only wide enough to allow 5 men to stand in a hoplite phalanx. No doubt all those training exercises from childhood on in "tree fucking" paid off big time. As one spartan fell, another immediately took his place from behind. At one point, the Spartans fought on top of bodies at least 12 men deep. As one comrade fell, the next in line was immediately able to step into the hoplite line. At the end the Persians had an up body fight which gave the Spartans another brief advantage.
Anyway, I think the movie is meant to be more true to the comic book account rather than an historical recreation.
Actualy, I am big on the here and now as well - for a variety of reasons but if I had to be transported back in time as I am now - I'd still pick to be a woman in ancient Sparta. I love to read too much to remain illiterate.
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